the end.

Camp is officially over.

I said goodbye to all my kids yesterday and today, and Lord knows I'm really gonna miss em.

Here are a few more pictures for you to love on.

Here you have brothers Keshaun (age 7) and Aair (age 5). For the most part Keshaun is a great kid. Helpful, good to his lil bro, and full of energy. But when he throws a tantraum, he trumps the rest. For a solid 30 minutes he will refuse to cooperate with me or any other leader until he gets his way. Of course, I'm not having any of that, and his little behind winds up in a lot of trouble. But such is life eh? I love him through our highs and lows. He's got a good heart, and if anything, he's got a lot of determination. His little bro Aair has a very cute lazy eye that gives him an air of mystified innocence (no joke). His voice is soft, he never gets upset, and loves to show off how well he can crash his little scooter (and himself ) into trees. Its pretty damn adorable.

Here you see sisters Junay and Destiny. These young women are full strength and dignity. Junay is in the 4th grade, is a rough talker, and is sweet as hell. She loves roughin' it with the boys in 4 square and competing unrelentingly with her classmate William Wiles. Destiny is in 2nd grade and is absolutely beautiful. She loves taking me by the hand down to the playground where she consistently beats my butt at any type of tag we play. She's feisty and incredibly intelligent. These sisters take the cake.

This is a beautiful picture. On the left you see Nedeshka. She's in 2nd grade and has beautiful, ultra-curly golden hair. She's a mixed baby and is stunning. I love her a lot, and I gladly soak up any moment I get with her. On the right (with the eye patch) is Itzaida. She's in the 1st grade and is the cutest little girl this side of the Atlantic. She has the bad habit of thinking that the rules we give the kids don't apply to her. When we tell the kids to be quiet, she always misses the memo and can be heard gaily chatting to whomever will listen. She's super spunky, is always well dressed (hence her fake pearl necklace), and wows all the leaders with her green/yellow/purple eyes. She's a keeper.

This is Rene. He kind of looks like Spock. Not in this picture, but in real life. He's so good. so so good. If I could take a kid home I'd take Rene. thats all I've got to say.

This is Sean. He's in 2nd grade and he's never caused me any trouble. He's a bit stubborn sometimes, but then again, aren't we all? He's often very serious. Though he smiles a lot he's not a huge jokster, and doesn't cause many issues... he just kinda goes with the flow. And when you have dozens of kids who are constantly pushing against the flow, ones like Sean are a breath of fresh air.

Here you see (from left to right starting in the back row) Mira, Shira, Dajah, Shayla, Brianna, Tunisha and Brittany. I hung out with these 7 girls for the last day together. It was just me and all of them, and you can bet that things didn't exactly go smoothly. All of them (expect for Shira) are in the 1st and 2nd grade and definitely always have something to say and always want to be the first one to say it. They are all so beautiful (don't you agree), and though they sometimes gave me a lot of grief, they also brought me a lot more joy. These young women live tough lives but still fight hard to play hard. I love 'em. love 'em love 'em love 'em.

thats all for today. I'm not sure if I'll keep updatin' this thing. I leave Camden on Friday (August 13) and will be back home on the 22nd. If you're interested in the rest of my life... well, just talk to me in person ;)

thanks for comin' along with me on this journey, esp. to those of you who kept up with this little page of mine.

peace & love

little women

me and some of my girls.

Tonight was Girls Night, and c'etait incroyable! I had a blast hanging out with the young ladies of camp Faith this evening. After a yummy (but ridiculously greasy) dinner of pizza, chips, cookies and punch, me and the other staff members collected the makeup and nail polish we scrounged from a near by dollar store and dolled our little ladies up. Needless to say, the girls loved this. Now I don't wear make up or nail polish, but luckily my girls were young enough to not care that my work was far below high quality. I absolutely LOVED doing this. Even though most of them were in their fancy dresses and cute heals, they went wild with excitement. They hooped, hollered, ran around in circles, and danced without music.... it was beautiful-I loved every noisey minute of it. At one point in the evening a few boys tried to sneak in to disrupt our fun. Well boss lady Jenn gave the girls the go ahead to attack, and all 25 little misses mobbed the sorry young men till they were begging for mercy. I sat quietly in the background and watched the scene. it was something pay-per-view woulda paid good money to air... ;). Little inner city women are a wonder to behold. I'm in love.

this was a good night.
thanks Lord.

the chillen's

Want to see pictures of some of my kids? I bet you do ;)

here you see the beautiful Aniyah (with the glasses) and Ayanna. I hang out with them every Monday afternoon. We bake, go to the park, do crafts, talk, and just have some good ol' fun whenever we're together. They're not related, but they're always together, and look sorta alike, so people call them "the twins". They act like they HATE this... but I think they secretly love it. I mean, come on, just look at how happy they are together ;)

For one of my art lessons I took my kids outside to do chalk murals on the side walk. But of course, I let them lay on pavement in any position they wanted so we could trace their bodies. Here you see an awesome 4th grader named Nasir. He's got a little fro-hawk, and is probably one of the sweetest kids I've met in all of Camden.

In this photo you see Hiram (on the right) and TJ (in the headlock). These boys are also in 4th grade, and definitely intimidated me the first day I met them. They're both husky and like to appear tough as nails. Thought the the former is true, the latter definitely isn't. Yea, they cause trouble in my art class 60% of the time, but during that other 40% their absolutely golden. I love these boys. By the way, they're cousins and live in a little house together with 9 other family members. definitely a tight squeeze.

Here you see Jason (on the right) and Aaron (on the left). These brothers are so chubby that they their bums shake from side to side whenever they run. Its adorable. Jason, whose in Kindergarten speaks in one word sentences, and is always snacking on chicken wings and slurpees. He cries a lot and is only ever consoled by his brother Aaron (who's in the first grade) or his cousin Jessica (a 2nd grader). Aaron is always smiling and is enthusiastic about everything under the sun. He too loves chicken wings and slurpees, and is constantly working to keep Jason happy. Its kind of cute. (also, these boys are two of the 4 asian students we get. I love being around them cause they remind me of vancouver and my friends back home... ;] )

This is Vance Carter (affectionately named after Vince Carter who played for the Toronto Raptors) and he is little trouble maker. He's in the second grade and bullies kids twice his size. but when they come 'round to bully him back he cries and cries and runs to me or another leader for help. He's overtly defiant. You tell him to go left, he'll proudly look at you and march right. Sometimes he annoys the hell out of me, and I just have to let him cry out his frustration till he's ready to talk right with me. But... I actually love this child. He is one of the most passionate children we have at camp. His face radiates with life every time I see him. He's expressive, and is an awesome story teller. Though he always runs to the wrong net when he has the basketball (without fail) the look on his face exudes pure determination and fight. His smile is spectacular. Yea, he's a trouble maker, but at least he's passionate and full of life. He's definitely one of my favorite kids.

Here you see me with Shayla. Yes, together we are Shayna and Shayla. I hang out with her and three other girls every thursday afternoon. She's a spunky little first grader who's extremely dramatic but a thrill to be around. I love her. Funny thing. As a camp we're collecting change to help send a team of teenagers to Honduras. Well, little Shayla didn't realize Honduras is a country, and eagerly came up to me one day with question after question about our coming trip to outer space! And this girl was dead serious! She excitedly told me that she'd never been outside of the sky before and wanted to know whether I'd left the earth yet myself. It was a great moment! And good for her, I thought! Why shouldn't we be able to collect enough money to go to outer space? I had to break the sad news to her that we aren't leaving the planet anytime soon, but I was proud of her thinking big ;)

alright, I've gotta peace outta this thing. But I'll add some more pictures of kids a little later.

Thanks for being interested!

my life is good here in Camden, New Jersey. it is very good.

I gotta be honest, I love being the art teacher. I love the squeals of excitement as the first and second graders mix their own purples, oranges, and greens. I love chatting with the kids as I walk them home in the hot hot heat of the afternoon. i love living on meager food rations, in an un-airconditioned home, in the blistering heat. It's tough but I love it. I love baking brownies with my first grade girls, and playing tag with my 4th graders. i actually love coaching basketball, and love pushing the kids to do their best during their exciting but difficult basketball games. i love it.

I wont lie, the kids often get on my nerves, my housemates (and I) can be inconsiderate and a pain in the ass to be around, the heat drains me and leaves me exhausted, and my voice is perpetually gone... but still I can't shake the underlying sense of purpose and meaning. it is just so good.

my heart is being challenged regarding some of the prejudgements I have about life in inner cities. the teenage pregnancies, the gang violence, the drug market... I can't claim to really get any of it, but I feel my heart softening towards the young men and women (and the old) who walk these paths. There is just something about Camden that draws me in. There is something about the people here, something in the strength and the perserverance etched in their faces that captures me. it's a humbling thing.

i stood quietly in my classroom today at about 10pm, all was dark save the christmas lights that lined the white board. I just wanted to soak in the moment- the reality that I am an art teacher in an inner city, and there I stood in my very own classroom. I have no idea how I got here, but Lord knows I'm overjoyed that I am.

one day at a time, my heart is growing up.
mm, mm, mm.

ps.

my dear friend Ashley from CherryHill, NJ asked me today "Shayna, does Canada have their own language?". I tried not to laugh in her face. but I failed...

ha! O america.

my heart is gripped.

camp today went great. but I just went through something with that 17 year old young man I told ya'll about a few posts back. His heart is so broken, he carries the weight of the world on his shoulders, and for some reason he chooses to tell me about it. He says he's got no love in his life. none at all. There is hope in this one girl he has feelin's for, but things aren't workin' out right with her. He told me that last week he went back to his old ways- pushin' drugs. i asked him why, and he replied "I'm lookin' for a way to die".

my heart dropped. i didn't know what to say. for a long moment we were both silent. i couldn't preach at him. it was no time for bible verses, theological arguments, eloquent speeches or anything like that. but I wouldn't have said any of that even if I knew how. i just spoke to him. words about God. such unworthy words about God. but the only words i had. i didn't tell him what to believe or how to believe. i didn't tell him anything christian. but i held his hand, and spoke the little i knew.

seek and you'll find, seek and you'll find, seek and you'll find.
lord, let him seek.

michael jordon said what?

Thursday and Friday were the first official days of camp. And for the most part they were very good days ;)

Here at Camp Faith I am an Art teacher and a basketball coach. now for those of you who know me very well that probably made you chuckle a little bit... but its true. I, SHAYNA JONES, am an art teacher and a basketball coach. Never in my wildest dreams would I ever see myself in either of these positions... and the reasons are simple. First of all i am HORRENDOUS at art - actually horrendous. The last time i took an "art class" I was in the 6th grade... and I'm now a senior in university. Feel free to do the math. Second of all, I have no clue how to play basketball, in fact the last time I actually sunk a basket was years ago. But despite these painfully obvious barriers I teach art and basketball to kids in grades 1 through 4 - Lord be with me!

Needless to say I am definitely handicapped in both these areas. But if I'm honest my lack of ability kind of thrills me. In order to teach my kids different art techniques I have to spend a fair amount of time researching, studying, and learning art skills in order to serve the kids well. Though I'm terrible at it I don't want that to hamper the kids from this chance to explore art themselves, you see? So a few days ago I spent some time learning about the color wheel, primary, secondary, and tertiary colors, and the basics in color theory , and tried to devise ways to teach this stuff to the kids in interactive and engaging ways. It was actually a lot of fun. Still the Lord is gonna have to carry me through this one - cause left to my own devises this Art Teaching thing could be a total flop. Prayer appreciated.

ah - and BASKETBALL. Oh man oh man. Without a doubt, I'm gonna be studying up on the ins and outs of this game over the next little while. I am co-coaching a group of about 20 boys aged 6 to 9... and it is not an easy thing. We had our first practice this past friday and it was a GONG SHOW. The other coaches and I did not prep well and the boys caught on to that. Luckily our first game was cancelled due to an impending heat wave (temperatures in the low 100s...... oh my goolay) so we've got next friday to organize ourselves, and somehow teach these kids how to play ball. Actually, we've got until next friday to teach me what the heck basketball is all about. haha.... what a summer this is gonna be.

you know... i love that i'm here. thank you lord that i'm here.



happy independence day!

peace & love.

Oh God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

in all aspects of my life.

give me the courage to love with an open heart.

amen.

did you hear?

today, oh today, oh today.

the people here utterly amaze me.

so much happened today, and it was all worthwhile. in the mornin' we had choir practice. YES - actual BLACK GOSPEL CHOIR practice (with actual black people! and that includes ME!!).... i'm lovin' it! But get this, we were only given about 50 minutes to learn three songs, and we are expected to perform these three songs at 3 different church services before 1000+ people (and i'm not mistaken, over a thousand people) without any other practices TOMORROW MORNING. Wild. Absolutely wild. But I gotta be honest, I'm e-x-c-i-t-e-d.

can I tell ya'll about the craziest part of my day? I was sitting at the piano just messin' around for a minute when some of the other interns came in to join me. Dacia, with her deep soulful voice, added a sweet sweet harmony to the tune I was makin' up, Chase beat-boxed and Will took percussion on any hard surface he could find. It was legit. Then this 17 year old kid named Has (pronounced H-ah-z) came in to join us. I love this kid - i genuinely love him. He's a big guy, maybe 300+ lbs, and has burnt chocolate skin. His smile is beautiful and his presence is deep. If I'm honest I was intimidated the first time I laid eyes on him a couple days ago, but today he just sat in on our jam session without any fuss. Well, after the commotion died down he grabbed hold of my hand and asked in his beautiful street talkin' way if I would sing a section of the song he'd recently written. I was BLOWN AWAY that he'd ask me of all people, so of course my answer was "yeah".

Fast forward 6 or 7 hours. the work/prep day has passed and I'm once again at the piano with Has and Will. Will plays the keys, I learn Has' tune, and then the magic begins. The song was deep. so incredibly deep. In the verses Has raps poetic and heart breaking words about a father who never showed him any love or respect, the pain of trying to understand his loveless world, and the hypocrisy from others that leaves him jaded; his words convey his resolve to be the opposite of his father and to live as a man with some actual integrity. I can't do him justice in this blog but the moment he opened his mouth and started rappin' on top of Wills soft piano accompaniment, I was lost. I couldn't believe the depth of emotion and talent in this one young man. I took the chorus and sang out what Has' voice couldn't:

"How could you hurt me

how could you leave me

I was your only child

how could you forsake me"

tears, tears, tears. I could feel 'em sting the back of my eyes as I was singin' his words, and watchin' him rhyme about the trauma in his life. it was so real, so deep, so holy. man oh man.

a lot of other things happened today. a lot of other good good things, but that time with Has really stirred my soul. He inspired me. Hell, I'm still inspired. i'm just in awe that I got to be apart of that moment. man oh man.

peace & love.

ps. i feel like I'm typin' in the way the people around here talk. I'm not tryin' to fake anything, trust me. Its honestly just comin' out this way (plus, droppin' your "g's" is just cool). try to love me anyways. ;)
PEACE.

Day 1

So, I am now here in Camden, New Jersey. I really can't believe it. After months of anticipation, and not a little prayer, I've actually arrived.

This city has so much color. Not just that the folks who live here are colored - cause they certainly are - but there's something about these streets, the many abandoned homes, the men and women sitting out on the front steps of their row homes, and the children splashing in the water from a fire hydrant that really gives this place character.

I'm definitely not in Kansas anymore, and I'm humbled by how ignorant I am about life outside of the west coast of Canada. The air is hot and muggy here. South Camden is the former home to a prison, and the current home to a sewage treatment plant, and a garbage dump - so the air is also toxic. The skin of the people who live here is as dark as mine (I've never been the majority before...its a nice change). Most of Camden is black and latino. And due to many different factors (which I am learning about each day that I'm here), Camden is one of the most impoverished cities in North America. I wouldn't doubt it. Though the town has a lot of character it is obviously poor. Though the dark skin of the folks here is beautiful, its obvious in their faces that life out here can get ugly. I've only been here two days and already I know I'm in over my head.

I'm working at Camp Faith here in South Camden. There are several others too (Camps peace, saved, promise, spirit, freedom, and courage). And I live in a place called The Brick House. Its got a lot of character. I'll take a video tour of it with my camera and post it in a minute. I live in a house with 9 other girls (Rachel, Ashley, Dacia, Doreen, Sarah, Natalie, Suzi, Katie & Sammie) and we've got one and one half bathrooms - its gonna be one hell of an adventure.

if you wanna pray for me, just pray God continues to be who he is. I know he's with me, I know he's in this city - hell, he's even with the 16 year old selling crack on the street corner. As long as God continues to be who he is, then all of us have a chance of finding meaning and hope in all this. I'll try to keep this blog updated, but if i'm honest I can't make any promises about the frequency.... i'm just saying. ;)

peace & love.

check out: www.urbanpromiseusa.org